I think I might have felt the earth move when you sat down next to me.

Anyone who knows us knows that The Man and I still play hide and seek, often in a very one-sided way where only one person knows that the game is happening and the other one is extremely surprised when they realize that they’re participating, so clearly we aren’t going to be old or jaded anytime soon. Also, I would never sit under a bug zapper, because I read research that showed they atomize bugs and exude the particulate matter of bug guts over a two meter radius. So if you sit like these people, you are breathing bug vapor. So I don’t know where this came from, except that subconsciously I must have registered the sound of my neighbor’s bug zapper while The Man and I were in the hot tub tonight.

We did have an outlet that was arcing some of the time, but only when I touched it. The Man didn’t believe me about it for months. Until he got zapped, of course. Then he fixed it. I don’t drink coffee, but I’ve seen the cold coffee-metal spoon-microwave combo on more than 1 occasion and once wrote a flash fiction about it, although, in hindsight, the ending should be the microwave laughing to itself or thinking “Revenge is mine” or  “My chance has come at last.”