Monthly Archives: October 2016

Blue Web Mandala

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Looks like a dropped a stitch on the bottom right. 

Whew! Busy weekend! The Man got a year older, which happens to people even when they’re so old no one really cares anymore, so I tried to jolly him up. Friday night we went to a carnival and Saturday night we went to a cabaret where he got to celebrate his birthday by being dragged onto stage by a troupe of belly dancers. I also accomplished 2 pieces of art in that time, but very few hours of sleep, so now I’m kind of goofy and unfocused, so I’m just tossing this slightly askew mandala up here and then trying to persuade my brain to turn off in the next couple hours.

Actually, I’m pretty pleased with the direction things are going. Sometimes I wonder if I can deliver on the things I promise but there’s no reason to believe I can’t. But then I wonder if that fear is the real reason I haven’t come as far as I wanted. Somehow, once other people’s money is involved, my self-confidence begins to question itself.

Adult Tutu in Blue, Purple, and Teal

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Not available in stores. You cannot order yours today.

Not being one of those people who ferociously guards their costuming secrets, I present here my first-ever handmade tutu, size adult medium, in blue, purple, and teal, what the Fox refers to as “dragon colors.” Although actually, maybe he means “Dragon colors,” as in my colors, since dragons come in every color, while I personally own a pair of shoes, and a several dresses, and some other garments that match this tutu. Also, a dragon tattoo.

This project is incredibly easy; it took maybe 5 or 6 hours. It required:

  • 1 yard of a stretchy, crocheted-type elastic band (something with decent sized holes in its pattern)
  • 6 yards of tulle
  • a small amount of thread
  • scissors
  • yardstick
  • needle

You could probably dispense with the needle and thread if you secured the waist with safety pins or just tie it together with the tulle. The elastic was the most expensive part at $4 a yard. The tulle was $4.50 for 6 yards, so the whole thing comes in under $10.

Basically, you measure your holey elastic to the part of your torso where you want it to hang (I chose just above my hips) and then create a circle of elastic with that circumference by sewing the two ends together. Then you cut the tulle into 18″ x 4″ strips. One by one, take your tulle strips and thread them through 2 juxtaposed loops in the elastic, with each end an equal length sticking. Then tie a simple half knot in the tulle, so you end up with a pair of 9″ strips sticking out of one loop in the elastic. Then repeat approximately 215 times.

Possibly with stiffer tulle or a smaller waistband, your might need fewer knots. If you’re making the kind of tutu where the tulle is long and hangs down, you probably need much less tulle. What I read online suggested that this project required 3 yards of tulle, but it definitely wasn’t fluffy enough until I got through the whole 6 yards.

Next week, we’re invited to a cosplay wedding, and also I’m the photographer. So I was wracking my brains trying to think of a good cosplay. Like people have suggested I should do Garnet from Stephen Universe, but not only is that a complicated costume, it seems pretty impractical to wear a giant visor while working as a wedding photographer. My go-to dress-ups are either Pippi Longstocking or Little Red Riding Hood, but the problem with Pippi is that you end up fussing with your hair all night to keep it on the wires that help it stick out from your head, and at this point my hair goes all the way down to my back, so getting the hair to stick out right in the first place would be a pain. As for Red, the riding hood seemed likely to get in the way of taking pictures, not to mention that it’s the bodice that makes the outfit really pop, but again, you can’t have a costume that restricts your movement/breathing while you work. Unless you work at a Ren Faire or something.

So, I mentioned this problem to the Vampire Bat, who frequently works as a professional photographer while in ornate costumes, and she was like: duh, slap some butterflies on your regular clothes and you’re already Delirium from The Sandman. Duh. Literally. I have the leather jacket, the combat boots, the fishnet shirt, the red hair, and a wide variety of outlandish stockings: colored, striped, fishnet. Now I just need to figure out how to make a bunch of fish float around my head. The sad thing is that I actually own a remote-controlled mylar fish balloon, but that would be another thing that would impede my ability to take pictures. No, the really sad thing is that I won’t be able to make it to Tucson Comicon this year because I got my media request in too late and also because I already have 3 parties to go to that weekend. Maybe I can just sneak in Friday night, which is the only free time I’ll have that weekend anyway.

I can still take this costume to at least 3 other events besides the wedding this year alone, and now I don’t have to steal the Girl’s tutu, which is more than 6 years old and has stretched-out elastic, ever again. Plus, you know, sometimes I just dress like this for fun, and this tutu matches more of my clothing than her pinky-pinky one.

So: some kind of hair piece that makes it look like fish are floating around my head, and then convince The Man to grow his beard and hair out a little, wear a peasant shirt, and carry a bindlestiff. He’s not much for cosplay, but if I can get the shirt, I can probably persuade him about the bindlestiff. With the addition of a loving but unwilling Destruction towering over me, my Delirium costume is complete.

Dragon Comics 144

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Also, do you think maybe we should have started this fire outside?

This comic has not featured dragon breathing fire on things in a while. PHWOOMPSH! Monsters burn pretty well. I realized just now that the monsters all should have had axe marks in their heads as per panel 4 in yesterday’s comic, but it’s after midnight and there are some issues with my drawing hand tonight.

I wonder if demonic fire is toxic. Maybe it’s not a good idea to roast marshmallows in it. Burning marshmallows are actually pretty dangerous to begin with. Apparently, they function something like napalm if you set them ablaze and they slather them across someone’s bare flesh.

The Man would probably still eat them, burning monster poison or not.

One fun thing about the tablet: it offers you a million ways to draw flames and they mostly all look good.

Dragon Comics 143

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Of course, Monster Bomb (TM) is effective on demons, but the axe is more satisfying.

Normally, I don’t feel good about killing things. Once I smashed a cockroach shortly after hearing some Buddhist lecture about how every living creature is a reincarnation of your mother and it almost made me cry. But some things are disgusting to begin with and intolerable once they get inside of your home. Some things need to be dispatched with extreme prejudice. But I still don’t like doing it, which is why it’s nice to have The Man around, because he’s much more efficient and confident about exterminating vermin.

Dragon Comics 142

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Sometimes the world won’t leave you alone. 

You know how it goes. You get busy, you let the chores pile up, you step away for a couple days, and before you know it, everything’s gotten away from you and the cave is infested with buzzing, flying demons. Every single time. A dragon can’t get a moment’s peace. How are you supposed to create something beautiful in that environment? How will dragon escape this mess? Besides cleaning up, obviously.

Top Tier Mandala

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It’s a wedding cake! It’s an insect colony! It’s an MRI of a human brain!

This weekend I got very little sleep and spent almost every waking hour in public. This is stressful for chronically fatigued introverts. However, it was gratifying to have the opportunity to meet like-minded people and shore up friendships with people I knew I liked but didn’t know very well.

Still, it’s hard to take an entire weekend off from regular life. Now my brain is everywhere but here. Feel like I’m behind schedule somehow. Things to think about. Nothing to draw, at the moment.

I have a theory about creepy clowns

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Being a bit of a motley fool myself, I sort of resent the way this trend has appropriated the value of tomfoolery.

Someone asked me the secret of being such a prolific writer, and I replied (in jest, natch), “I sit and think about what I’m going to write for 3 months before I write it.” Sometimes, not always. But usually I don’t work fast enough to write about trends while the trends are still relevant. I think my Pokemon Go comic was the last time I managed to be timely and topical in a comic. I don’t know how Matt Parker and Trey Stone do it week after week. Today I had this idea about creepy clowns, and it got enough traction as a Facebook status that I dared try it in this space instead of copping out and posting a photograph of my comic book.

I have a similar theory about zombies and the dehumanization of strangers in a society that’s too large and impersonal, where strangers are dangerous and individual lives have no meaning. We’re all completely jaded, many without compassion, most having learned to mistrust and possibly fear those who are the least bit different.

Even if it is a hoax or an urban legend or a guerrilla marketing tactic, there’s a reason it resonates in the collective consciousness, and I think it’s safe to say that some people are taking advantage of that fear for their own weird, personal reasons: to get attention and stay anonymous at the same time, I guess, or else because they’re violent freaks, or just want to be. The Man got a robocall from the Boy’s school explaining that there had been no threat at the school, but given that the student’s safety and comfort were paramount, anyone who showed up dressed or made up like a creepy clown would be suspended.

All of which seems totally normal in a world where kids regularly practice their active shooter drills because they know it’s entirely possible that a violent freak will shoot up their school.

I’d rather talk about augmented reality

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This means something, I promise.

The uncorrected proof of my comic book arrived today. I found a missing quotation mark in the text and none of the italics got set, but I think they already printed the run. No big deal; I knew there would be one typo no matter what. No one can edit themselves. It’s a gorgeous thing, this comic book, otherwise pretty perfect. But I have other feelings about it. Maybe tomorrow. I’m not ready to share yet. Besides, I couldn’t get a decent photo in the available light.

So, I was sitting at my desk searching for inspiration. Like, literally searching. I keep some weird bits in the drawers, all sorts of random tiny materials and pieces of projects, including my magic bottle from exercise 32 of The Trickster’s Hat. Some of the elements had fallen off, maybe 2 years ago, and formed a part of the whimsical detritus of the drawer that I always open in search of a working pen, but which never contains a working pen. And I decided to fix the magic bottle. Yes, I did. I fixed it. Then I improved it a little.

Which got me thinking about Nick Bantok’s method, and how he changed my mind about collage. Collage always seemed too easy to me; they’re fun to make but they don’t require as much talent as other media, in the sense that you’re taking pieces from lots of other people’s work and don’t have to create any of the elements yourself. Just discover them. But going through The Trickster’s Hat requires a lot of collage, with enough variation to demonstrate how magazine scraps can be just as basic an element as paint. Besides that, the way I make my comics is in large part a collage system, even though I redraw the lines myself.

Anyway, by the time the magic bottle was finished it was kind of late and I was still uninspired so I decided to try to create an entire comic from magazine scraps. By the time I finished cutting (old National GeographicSmithsonian, and Atlantic pages) it was way too late to try something else. I think, given more time, I could have produced something a little more cogent, but this does say a few things. I don’t know how successful it is as a comic, but Dave McKean says that any pairing of words and images is a comic, so by that metric it’s a rousing success.

Sparks

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I think I might have felt the earth move when you sat down next to me.

Anyone who knows us knows that The Man and I still play hide and seek, often in a very one-sided way where only one person knows that the game is happening and the other one is extremely surprised when they realize that they’re participating, so clearly we aren’t going to be old or jaded anytime soon. Also, I would never sit under a bug zapper, because I read research that showed they atomize bugs and exude the particulate matter of bug guts over a two meter radius. So if you sit like these people, you are breathing bug vapor. So I don’t know where this came from, except that subconsciously I must have registered the sound of my neighbor’s bug zapper while The Man and I were in the hot tub tonight.

We did have an outlet that was arcing some of the time, but only when I touched it. The Man didn’t believe me about it for months. Until he got zapped, of course. Then he fixed it. I don’t drink coffee, but I’ve seen the cold coffee-metal spoon-microwave combo on more than 1 occasion and once wrote a flash fiction about it, although, in hindsight, the ending should be the microwave laughing to itself or thinking “Revenge is mine” or  “My chance has come at last.”

It’s OK If You Don’t Get Me

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Just keeping it weird here.

This is the latest T-shirt design. I know it’s completely weird and unsellable, but literally my entire M.O. is to just do the thing that my muse tells me do, regardless of how ridiculous it seems. Then, later on, I wonder what the heck I was thinking, but some percentage of the time it works out for the best. The poet Syd Lea once told me that I should keep doing whatever felt right to me regardless of what anyone else said. He said, “Be stubborn, woman.”

Not that I needed that advice. Maybe he figured I was just going to do that anyway.

The original version of this design was the last panel of the first BJC comic, about how sometimes your own mother doesn’t understand you so you can’t expect much from the rest of the world. Even in context, it’s bizarre. The benefit of this sort of extremely niche design is that if anyone else does appreciate it, you know you truly have commonalities at the core.

If you’d like to purchase this bizarre comic panel on a variety of clothing, paper products, and household items, you can obtain It’s OK If You Don’t Understand Me in my RedBubble shop.

Tomorrow I guess I’ll go back to drawing longer comics. Maybe.